2017 St Cross Stitchers Ward

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Mabel Figworthy
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Re: 2017 St Cross Stitchers Ward

Post by Mabel Figworthy »

Oh Sally poor you! I'm glad it wasn't any worse but this sounds quite bad enough already - look after yourself and allow everyone else to look after you too!
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Re: 2017 St Cross Stitchers Ward

Post by mysterystitcher »

moan moan Rheuma bothers me again. This winter has been crazy! Every week the weather is different, and sometimes it changes every day! How can anyone keep up with this? moan moan
Thanks for being there for me, Serinde. I can barely walk at the moment, so just resting here, taking it easy and eating :cake: is the best thing I am able to think of right now.
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Re: 2017 St Cross Stitchers Ward

Post by karen4bells »

Mysterstitcher and Sally, please do rest up and I hope both of you feel better soon :beg: :hug:
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richardandtracy
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Re: 2017 St Cross Stitchers Ward

Post by richardandtracy »

Not sure this counts:
Got some horrible news over the weekend. My 85yo step mother has been having a few problems and ended up in A&E Tuesday last. She got out after a case review on last Saturday.
She has an inoperable brain tumour. No surgery, no chemo & no radio therapy are considered applicable. She may have secondary tumours in her lungs & intestines. As for how long, may be weeks, may be months. The tumour seems to be growing fairly slowly. Probably.
The only good thing is, while my father & step mother live 300 miles from us in Devon, at least 4 of her family live in the same village. She does not want to see hide nor hair of me & my family.

It has left us rather in a state of shock & limbo.
And my dad.. well, my mother died 12 years ago of inoperable pancreatic cancer and that horrible sequence seems to be happening again.

Regards,

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Mabel Figworthy
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Re: 2017 St Cross Stitchers Ward

Post by Mabel Figworthy »

Richard, I'm sorry your bad news is made even more difficult by the family situation, but it's good to know that she has family near. Is it possible for you to talk to your father in support of him even if visiting is not an option?
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Doreen
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Re: 2017 St Cross Stitchers Ward

Post by Doreen »

Dear Richard I am sorry to hear your news my thoughts are with you

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rcperryls
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Re: 2017 St Cross Stitchers Ward

Post by rcperryls »

Wow! The Ward has been way to busy and the first month of the year isn't over yet :(
In order of posting:

Sally, rest and take care of yourself. Since I have been known to have some pretty nasty falls I know how awful it can be. Most important is to follow Doctor's orders and don't rush into doing anything before you are ready and the doctor says its okay. Sending you lots of virtual :hug: (don't want to hurt you) and real love. Will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

Mysterystitcher, rest up until you can get up comfortably. Hope you will be feeling better soon.

Richard, my heart goes out to your father as I know this is a very difficult time for him, made more difficult I'm sure since you can't be with him to offer direct help and support. I'm sure that whatever long distance support you can give him will be most appreciated.

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Re: 2017 St Cross Stitchers Ward

Post by wendywombat »

Oh dear, Richard. I'm sorry that your stepmother has cut you out. Difficult things, stepmothers. I know, I had one!
I hope that you'll be able to offer support by phone to your father and thereby help him through this difficult time.
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Squirrel
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Re: 2017 St Cross Stitchers Ward

Post by Squirrel »

Mysterystitcher, I hope the weather settles to one thing or the other for you and so make coping with the arthritis easier.

Richard, "Of course it counts - silly boy". I am so sorry for your situation but knowing your ability to find answers for most things I am sure that you will find a way to support your dear Dad through this horror time.


As for me - thank you all for your care I am feeling more like me this morning and back to bossing the dogs around and relatively pain free now. Still a bit sore in places but that will go too with time.
Thank you Serinde for your help and
Blessings and Thanks to all.
Sally in Brisbane Australia

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richardandtracy
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Re: 2017 St Cross Stitchers Ward

Post by richardandtracy »

Thanks for your support.
I have always.. Well, suppose I must qualify that; For the last 40 odd years I have spoken to my parents for an hour or so on the phone every weekend. While we tend not to say a lot meaningful, the general chit-chat keeps us together. [Slightly different from my brother who contacts them 2 or 3 times a year in a good year.]
My dad has been finding things occasionally difficult with my step mother recently, she has been feeling permanently cold, flying off the handle about little things, refusing to see anyone she doesn't see on a nearly daily basis. This diagnosis gives a reason even if it isn't able to do anything to help.
As for finding a solution. No. Feel as helpless as with my mother. In her case she only survived 6 weeks from diagnosis, and was in a hospice for 3 of those weeks. Whenever I think back to that, it feels like being punched in the stomach all over again.

Regards,

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Serinde
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Re: 2017 St Cross Stitchers Ward

Post by Serinde »

Richard, my heart goes out to you. I understand exactly the insult and horrible thing that pancreatic cancer is (sister and father-in-law, within 18 months of each other, 8 weeks from diagnosis to passing away in both cases). This is different, although the end is the same. You've kept the lines of communication open for over a decade -- I'm sure you'll find a way now to help your father and, at the same time, help yourself, too. :hug:

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Lulu22
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Re: 2017 St Cross Stitchers Ward

Post by Lulu22 »

Sally I hope you are starting to feel better after your fall and Mystery Stitcher I hope you are feeling better too I'm sending gentle hugs your way :grouphug:

Richard I am so sorry you are having to deal with this dreadful situation, even if you can't visit, keeping in touch with your father will I hope provide you both with some comfort and support.
I lost my father to kidney cancer and secondary brain cancer the day after my 18th birthday, it was the worst experience of my life, I remember walking round the shops wondering what to buy him for his birthday knowing he had days left to live, and I too have a step mum - she wanted nothing more to do with us after my father's death, despite telling him she would be there for the Grandchildren. I did visit her once with my eldest son but she was so frosty I never went back. I don't think you ever really get over it.
My thoughts are with you Richard :hug:
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rcperryls
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Re: 2017 St Cross Stitchers Ward

Post by rcperryls »

Richard, I know exactly what you mean about feeling punched in the stomach. My husband died 6 1/2 years ago from pancreatic cancer. From diagnosis to death was also 6 weeks. He did have surgery, but the cancer was much larger than the tests had shown. As for your stepmother, if this is new behavior on her part (regarding you and your family) it may be due to the cancer. I was very lucky in the stepmother my father chose. She was a very loving and caring woman and my sister and I stayed in contact and visited her from my father's death to hers. She was the only grandmother my niece and nephew new. That's the type of stepmom and grandmother I try to be. Don't understand and don't want to be able to understand people who are like the ones y'all describe.

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Squirrel
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Re: 2017 St Cross Stitchers Ward

Post by Squirrel »

Thank you all for your support and attention it is greatly appreciated. I am healing ok and even managed to get my hair washed and rinsed properly this morning - first time since Tuesday. :whoop:
Sally in Brisbane Australia

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Serinde
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Re: 2017 St Cross Stitchers Ward

Post by Serinde »

Nothing, nothing worse than horrible hair. :tizzy: So glad that's been sorted.
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Re: 2017 St Cross Stitchers Ward

Post by mysterystitcher »

Honestly, now...I don't know what to say.
Richard...I hope you find some solution. I can't give you any advice. The only thing I can say is this: take one day at a time. That has been the motto of my life for years.
I am so sad for you all who must suffer. My own suffering is little in comparison. I'm glad my lungs are still in pretty good shape. Of course I need my medications to function every day, but as long as I have them I am fine.
Right now RJ (rheuma juvenilis) is...well, one day is good, the next may be miserable. That's how much the weather changes here. There may be days the ginger alone is enough, but then there are days when ginger alone is not enough and I need "real" painkiller too. I am glad I am able to sleep, though, and that is thanks to the allergy pill I take every evening. The symptoms stay away and I get even some sleep.
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Re: 2017 St Cross Stitchers Ward

Post by mysterystitcher »

My life is miserable. I had to come here the first day in the morning yesterday. I've been here since then. The nurse told me it is raining or sleeting outside. My body knows it's true. No wonder I've been in pain.
I am glad I've been able to stitch, though. It has helped to pass the time.
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Re: 2017 St Cross Stitchers Ward

Post by CuriousKitty »

Mostly not a physical ailment, but a wallet one. Apparently I forgot to pay January's PUD (water/utility) bill. What happened was that their website was down so I couldn't pay it in one go like I do with all my bills (TMobile, PUD, Comcast, Credit Cards) and had to wait a few days and I guess I forgot about it. Fast forward to few days ago after flipping out realizing there was a $263.22 charge from January and February hadn't yet shown up. So I paid the January bill, and now the February bill of $532.17!!! So after practically getting a heart attack at work, I realize the inflated amount is the missed January bill that I paid two days earlier and the new February bill. I'm not sure if the story went nation-wide, but here in the PNW, it's been on the news about how PUD is basically gouging prices drastically, especially in my town. Yay for us right? On top of that we had our Vet visit today for Prince (aka snorty fatty fluff) who is not only 5lbs overweight (glutton) he has an ear infection, due for two vaccines and a lovely vet bill of $386 dollars.

And yet even more, my Uncle is having his second marriage just around the corner on March 18th (I'm happy for him really, I like Lisa a lot) but we got a whole 2 month notice and they didn't send out invites to family (no idea if there were invites at all, I'm already very sure this is a super low-key wedding since it's 2nd marriages for both). My mother who was pressuring us to book a hotel room before we even knew if I'd get time off (I did get confirmation of that this week) so she could do a reduced rate through her work is making all sorts of noise about how I'm the (implied) irresponsible one for not booking ASAP. So we need to book 2 nights and I don't even know if Zak's going to be able to come since Dad is coming and that means if they both go, there's only 2 guys to run jobs while they're out of town and they're booked solid through April so Zak may not even go in order to finish work for Dad (the joy of family business).

And my friend who's coming for a convention in April (she lives in Connecticut) has asked if we can share hotel rooms in Seattle (which is fine, I like her I don't mind, okay so no romantic sexy time with the husband, but we have the rest of the year for that) to reduce costs because she's flying to Montana after the convention to move a mutual friend of ours with her to Connecticut (to move in with her) and her cats (so recap, friend flys from Connecticut > Seattle, stay a week > Montana > Connecticut with friend + cats). Which is great, cut costs! Now we have to find new rooms though for 3 of us since we all booked 1 King hotel rooms for ourselves. Oh and the PARKING. Parking for 5 days is practically $300-400 during convention week.

The only light at the end of the tunnel is tax returns at the moment. And my weekly paycheck in 2 days to take the sting out of the vet visit. But while there's definitely wiggle room I'm feeling a little crazy from hotel craziness.

And then there's the side notes.

It's a constant thing, and it's been a problem since high school but I've mostly ignored it. Something's up with my right knee ligaments (I think). If I don't slowly stretch it out and walk very (stately) slowly, I run a common risk of shooting pain in my knee and in not uncommon instances, falling on it. With that (since high school) is the constant back pain- that's mostly translated into hip something. Sleeping at night over the years has been hard, but I feel it's gotten harder more recently. It's rare I fall asleep before 2 am any night, even those where I work at 8 and therefore up at 6. And it's rare that I can find a comfortable way to lay. The insomnia is getting pretty bad and just finding a way to lay is hard too.

And Zak and I got married last June, and in the 5 years living together (now 5.5) we've been careful and never had a "whoopsie oh crap I need a pregnancy test" moment (okay I lied, it was once in the beginning, turns out I was just a whole month late, like usual). Now I've been pretty firm about a few things, namely at least by 30 (my 30+ coworkers all tell me they'd rather have had their kids a little sooner because energy levels took a drop) and that I wasn't quite ready to give up being mostly irresponsible with my life (oh and no more than 2, but I may have reduced that to 1). I've relaxed a bit, and we're not using protection (and honestly I think relationship wise we're better for it but that's not a public discussion)- but the thing is, I have no idea if I'm really ready for it to happen. So I told Zak if it happens, it happens; if it doesn't, it doesn't. We'll worry about it (if it doesn't happen) in a year or two.

But we want to be in a house sometime next year (apartment living). And I might just be an emotional female right now because monthly issues, but it's the first one after having stopped protection and that insidious sinking feeling seeps in of whether it's me or him and if it's me (and yes I know it's only been a month, relax you crazy woman I tell myself, you weren't sure if you even wanted it this fast) can I deal with it? Can we afford it?

Money money money, it's the root of all evil and I totally need to relax and stop worrying it's not as bad as I make it out to be and yet I can't help feel that it really is and I'm just denying it all.
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Serinde
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Re: 2017 St Cross Stitchers Ward

Post by Serinde »

Welcome to our newest chill room. :)

Even in the best regulated households, a bill can occasionally slip beneath the radar. Review your processes -- like not closing the desktop, in my case, sire. :oops: Now it's paid, and no need to be concerned about it.

Why not just throw a family party for your uncle after the wedding? I can understand your mum wants to go -- it's her brother -- but for a family business, it's just not possible sometimes to drop everything. You and Zak are adults. You are allowed to make your own decision and not be railroaded.

I can't believe the cost of parking at this convention! :shock: Hotel craziness is really a thing, I guess. :doh:

As for the rest: relax. Take a deep breath. Let it out slowly. The future will bring what it does in its own good time.
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Mabel Figworthy
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Re: 2017 St Cross Stitchers Ward

Post by Mabel Figworthy »

Gabrielle, what Serinde said!
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