Mostly not a physical ailment, but a wallet one. Apparently I forgot to pay January's PUD (water/utility) bill. What happened was that their website was down so I couldn't pay it in one go like I do with all my bills (TMobile, PUD, Comcast, Credit Cards) and had to wait a few days and I guess I forgot about it. Fast forward to few days ago after flipping out realizing there was a $263.22 charge from January and February hadn't yet shown up. So I paid the January bill, and now the February bill of $532.17!!! So after practically getting a heart attack at work, I realize the inflated amount is the missed January bill that I paid two days earlier and the new February bill. I'm not sure if the story went nation-wide, but here in the PNW, it's been on the news about how PUD is basically gouging prices drastically, especially in my town. Yay for us right? On top of that we had our Vet visit today for Prince (aka snorty fatty fluff) who is not only 5lbs overweight (glutton) he has an ear infection, due for two vaccines and a lovely vet bill of $386 dollars.
And yet even more, my Uncle is having his second marriage just around the corner on March 18th (I'm happy for him really, I like Lisa a lot) but we got a whole 2 month notice and they didn't send out invites to family (no idea if there were invites at all, I'm already very sure this is a super low-key wedding since it's 2nd marriages for both). My mother who was pressuring us to book a hotel room before we even knew if I'd get time off (I did get confirmation of that this week) so she could do a reduced rate through her work is making all sorts of noise about how I'm the (implied) irresponsible one for not booking ASAP. So we need to book 2 nights and I don't even know if Zak's going to be able to come since Dad is coming and that means if they both go, there's only 2 guys to run jobs while they're out of town and they're booked solid through April so Zak may not even go in order to finish work for Dad (the joy of family business).
And my friend who's coming for a convention in April (she lives in Connecticut) has asked if we can share hotel rooms in Seattle (which is fine, I like her I don't mind, okay so no romantic sexy time with the husband, but we have the rest of the year for that) to reduce costs because she's flying to Montana after the convention to move a mutual friend of ours with her to Connecticut (to move in with her) and her cats (so recap, friend flys from Connecticut > Seattle, stay a week > Montana > Connecticut with friend + cats). Which is great, cut costs! Now we have to find new rooms though for 3 of us since we all booked 1 King hotel rooms for ourselves. Oh and the PARKING. Parking for 5 days is practically $300-400 during convention week.
The only light at the end of the tunnel is tax returns at the moment. And my weekly paycheck in 2 days to take the sting out of the vet visit. But while there's definitely wiggle room I'm feeling a little crazy from hotel craziness.
And then there's the side notes.
It's a constant thing, and it's been a problem since high school but I've mostly ignored it. Something's up with my right knee ligaments (I think). If I don't slowly stretch it out and walk very (stately) slowly, I run a common risk of shooting pain in my knee and in not uncommon instances, falling on it. With that (since high school) is the constant back pain- that's mostly translated into hip something. Sleeping at night over the years has been hard, but I feel it's gotten harder more recently. It's rare I fall asleep before 2 am any night, even those where I work at 8 and therefore up at 6. And it's rare that I can find a comfortable way to lay. The insomnia is getting pretty bad and just finding a way to lay is hard too.
And Zak and I got married last June, and in the 5 years living together (now 5.5) we've been careful and never had a "whoopsie oh crap I need a pregnancy test" moment (okay I lied, it was once in the beginning, turns out I was just a whole month late, like usual). Now I've been pretty firm about a few things, namely at least by 30 (my 30+ coworkers all tell me they'd rather have had their kids a little sooner because energy levels took a drop) and that I wasn't quite ready to give up being mostly irresponsible with my life (oh and no more than 2, but I may have reduced that to 1). I've relaxed a bit, and we're not using protection (and honestly I think relationship wise we're better for it but that's not a public discussion)- but the thing is, I have no idea if I'm really ready for it to happen. So I told Zak if it happens, it happens; if it doesn't, it doesn't. We'll worry about it (if it doesn't happen) in a year or two.
But we want to be in a house sometime next year (apartment living). And I might just be an emotional female right now because monthly issues, but it's the first one after having stopped protection and that insidious sinking feeling seeps in of whether it's me or him and if it's me (and yes I know it's only been a month, relax you crazy woman I tell myself, you weren't sure if you even wanted it this fast) can I deal with it? Can we afford it?
Money money money, it's the root of all evil and I totally need to relax and stop worrying it's not as bad as I make it out to be and yet I can't help feel that it really is and I'm just denying it all.